Just old light?

Cassius:
"The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars,
But in ourselves, that we are underlings."
Julius Caesar (I, ii)

In my Shakespearean Lit class we just finished reading "The Tragedy of Julius Caesar," which of course I read in high school. We were talking about the character of Cassius (I love the name Cassius but probably wouldn't ever name a kid that now ...) and about how he is really the only dynamic character in the whole play. Brutus doesn't change, Caesar doesn't change (just dies) and Marc Antony doesn't really change either. But Cassius does. He goes from being a boastful, prideful man bent on murdering Caesar because he is jealous and threatened and hates being ruled over by Caesar. He flirts with death himself at one point, going about flashing his bear chest in a lightening storm and not giving a damn about damnation. By the end of the play, he is superstitious to the point of being scared of birds and wanting a true god to worship. He takes stock in what he cannot know for certain and leans on signs to allow him a glimpse of his future.

So today my Shakespearean Lit prof was talking about the connectedness of the universe. He said that he didn't think many of us in the class probably read our horoscopes because it was widely considered unChristian (capital C intended). But he went on to say that because of the interconnectedness of the universe, there is no reason to dismiss "signs" that may allow us to "see" into the future, including the reading of the stars. I've always felt silly reading my horoscope until today, not that I plan my life around it or anything close to that, but now just maybe I'll be prepared for something! Besides, today it said my creative juices were flowing, which is a good thing! Haha

okay, 3 posts in 1 day is a little over-the-top...

May the best you have ever seen be the worst you will ever see.
May the mouse never leave your grain store with a tear drop in its eye.
May you always stay hale and hearty until you are old enough to die.
May you still be as happy as I always wish you to be.
---Scottish toast

I miss my friend Will a lot. A lot, a lot.

Lately

Lately, I haven't know where to turn. As I said over the summer,

"Should we go left or right?? left, right, left, right, which direction should i go?!? oh my gawhd it's like my life!!"

I'm already tired of school and I've been in for 4 weeks, one of which I didn't go except for Monday because of the snow...But then again, if I wasn't in school, what would I be doing? Working part time in a tanning salon and thats it? No thanks. And I'm sad, too. I feel like I'm missing out on stuff that is important, such as the whole "college experience." But then again, I have to ask my self, do I want the JBU experience? And honestly, I don't think that would work for me. Once again, as I often do when I find myself not on a school break, I don't really like going there. Its not the professors, its not the students, its me. Another thing, I'm sad that all of my really good friends are in relationships...except for Hanny and Michelle, I've gone from having 3 single best friends to 0. So thank god for Hanny and Michelle...everything is changing, and I don't like it too much. I just feel lonely and I think that just sucks!

Okay, I just walked away and cleaned a tanning bed and realized that I have a great life. I'm really not that lonely, yesterday and today, I got to see 3 of my most special friends (courtney, kayla, and aubs) and tomorrow I will see my dear friend (alex) and my ashley and my benn come back to siloam tomorrow, so thank goodness for all of those great people!! Seriously, I have the most amazing family for whom I am so grateful. I have a second family of friends that love me and that I love back, so so much. I don't have a boyfriend, but then again, i say it all the time, I don't really want want one. DAMN YOU VALENTINE'S DAY!!! That must be what this is all about, right???!?!? (Just say yes, okay?!)

the rest of my random things

I just realized that I am goofy and only gave myself 20 random things...so here are the last 5:

21. I love poetry.
22. One of my favorite things to eat is spaghetti.
23. I love cooking, and one day want to take some classes at Le Cordon Bleu in Paris.
24. I loved Lizzy McGuire, especially the movie, and all the Mary Kate and Ashley movies, too!25. I didn't go to school today because it was too icy. My school doesn't have snow days, but I give them to myself.

25 Random Things

Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

(To do this, go to "notes" under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people (in the right hand corner of the app) then click publish.)

1. I have really weird dreams almost every night. I almost always remember them. And my mom almost always analyzes them. Its one of our finest sources of entertainment!
2. I never liked coffee until I went to France with Madame Wann my Junior year of high school. Now I love it.
3. My favorite place in the entire world is probably Margotzhoitcheim, Germany.
4. When I grow up, I want to teach English in Europe for a few years before coming home and teaching in Siloam Springs.
5. I love to read good books. My favorite book of all time is "East of Eden," at least for now.
6. I love Shakespeare.
7. I love engaging in witty banter with my friend Courtney.
8. I've never been one to physically fight with people until I met Ashley. We like to smack each other.
9. If I need fashion help, I go to Sydney or Bryn.
10. When people ask me for fashion advice, I never quite know what to say. Especially if they ask me if something matches. To me, if its in the same color family in anyway, it matches.
11. I will probably always think my little sister Hannah is cooler than me.
12. My dad always says that Sami and I are the most alike of all his children. She's 13, I'm 20. That scares me a little!
13. When we move into our new house, mine and Hannah's living room will be Van Gogh-esque.
14. On Friday night, Paul, Biswell, Cory, and Zach sat around talking about "stupid JBU student teachers" and really scared me. When I do my student teaching, it could be for Sami's class!
15. I have a trunk full of t-shirts in sizes to fit everyone who'd need to borrow one. They do, because people get naked in my room all the time. (For some reason, my room is deemed the room you change into your suit in for the hot tub!)
16. When I turned 20, I invited people who were 4 years old to people who were 55 years old. I love having a wide range of friends!
17. My brother and sisters' have the coolest friends ever! They're my friends too!
18. I want to have 5 kids all in a row: Jack Morgan , William Jameson, Nicholas Mitchell, Cora Beth Louise , and Amelia Joyce (in no particular order)
19. I miss the beach so much. In fact, I dreamed about it last night!
20. I collect furniture, which doesn't make sense because I don't have a lot of space. So far, I've collected: 3 desks, an old "junkie" (as mother calls it) dresser, 2 red rocking chairs, an old church pew, a book case, a tea cart, a queen sized bed, a trunk, a hand-made bench, and 2 black cafe chairs.

School

So I started back to school yesterday, the day after my twentieth birthday! I did horribly last semester, both in school and personally, with a lot of nonsense being a part of my daily life and a lot of important stuff put onto the back burner. My goal this semester is to get grades to be proud of, i.e., no C's, just A's and B's! Also I want to make new friends and get a little more connected on campus (but don't get crazy, mom!). I guess thats really all.

Its Hot in Here!

So after three weeks of working at Wal-Mart, my friend called in a favor and helped me get a great job working in a tanning salon in Siloam. Let me tell you, after three weeks of feeling like crap because I didn't know how to be a checker, being a friendly tanning salon girl is quite fun! Plus I get to tan for free and the girls I work with are super great about trading shifts around! I work a lot of weekend, but I suppose that may help keep me out of trouble? I don't know about that though ;)

I'm new to this whole blogging thing...any suggestions from around the world?